“She is one beautiful girl!” My heart beated shaking from a mixture of feelings!
I took a look at her as I held her in my arms, “She is!!” I said to the nurse. “How can you love someone so much that you just met?!” I was scared bringing a new baby into the world not knowing what to expect. Excitement filled me up as my mom took a look at her, “A new beginning” she said with a big smile on her face, “She is defiantly a Genesis.” As we drive home form the hospital she starts to cry. It was the cutest thing until the point where she wouldn’t shut up. We fed her some baby formula and she stopped. The first night was bad. She cried all through the night she just wouldn’t sleep. Since she was with me all day (because lucky for me it was summer vacation) I would not let her take naps through the day so maybe she would sleep at night, but it didn’t work. After awhile she got used to it and everything went better.
For her first birthday I took her to the store and I got her a new outfit that she loved! I showered her and got her ready, my mom threw her a birthday party. “She looks so cute and big!” My aunt said holding Genesis present in one of her hands, “She’s adorable” My older sister said, standing behind her. I knew Genesis was having a great time because like me she loves attention! Finally, it was time to cut the cake, she was ever so happy, and finally she blew the candle out! She was probably too young to know about the birthday wish so as I stood behind her and whisper “I hope you grow up to be a smart, strong and beautiful woman.” As for now I think its one wish that might actually come true!
When I take a look at her now (she’s three) it’s like I can see my reflection. She wants to be just like me.” When are you coming back?” she asks hoping I say today, holding back my tears I respond “Soon baby girl” I can see she wants to cry too. Her black, Chinese eyes can speak the words she doesn’t want to say, “Why not today? We can go pick you up, gather your stuff”, regretting every stupid decision I’ve made, wanting to cry, not wanting to hear what she’d say next “What’s wrong?” she asks confused as a three year old can be, not understanding the situation I have put myself in, I cant find an answer to her question. I hang up the phone, tell my fosters the call was lost. I can’t hold the tears any longer and I brake! Wanting to be with my little girl and whishing I was with her! I think of her again her face, her smile, her laugh, and it gives me hope! I find the reason I want to change, I find the reason why I need to straighten up... Because at home there is a little girl who waits for the day that I can be home to stay for good.
7 comments:
When I first read this, it was amazing. I don't know how I would deal. When I see you at school I wouldn't have ever thought that you were going though this. You're daughter is way adorable. She knows you love her with all your heart. Keep strong, never miss a min you have to spend with her. Peace Love.
♥Elee
You did vary well, I know your duaghter loves you. Your a great person and just by knowing you and hearing you talk about you little girl is amazing. This narritve was touching. You have came so far, keep up the good work!!
The fact that you turned your life around for a baby was a good choice because knowing you can still live your life and just leave your baby with your mom and still party would be better but instead you choose to let the baby have a mom was a great way to chose the path of a better life.
by the sound of it, it sounds like you really love genesis and want to be a great mother. and seem like your holding her close to your heart thats a good thing. love is the strongest connections we have in between each other. genesis may not understan now but she will when the time is right. just keep loving her and show the state your responsible so you can be there with her to watch her grow up and be there for her. you can do it, your strong and can make it through your almost there keep pushing and get out so you can be with her.
That is cool that she is your motivation. i am still looking for something worth living. that is also cool you understand what you have done and the consequenses you have. but you can always change. i liked how you wrote the story. and i hope you have good luck.
"My heart beated shaking from a mixture of feelings" This describes it good. I think its cute that you have a kid and that you love her as much as you do.
i agree this was very heart warming Good Job!
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