"But oh, what a deceiver he turned out to be! Only really cruel people can be called deformed. Virtue is beauty, but someone beautiful and wicked is like an empty box decorated by the devil."
My Opinion to this is that beauty doesn’t matter how you look. There are guys that think because the girl is mean that they are ugly. I don’t think people should call anybody deformed just because they are cruel. I think that girls, who are cocky, conceited are the one’s who are rude because they think they are better then anyone else.
I think that theirs girls who try to be like other girls because they are pretty and are popular. I think the girls that are like that have the nastiest attitude. People sometimes make fun of the people who are really ugly but I think you should get to know a person before you say mean things about them because it don’t matter if their ugly there attitude and how they act makes them be cute.
Just because you’re beautiful on the outside doesn’t mean you have the true beauty inside. I don’t agree with this quote. I know someone who is beautiful in the inside but on the outside there really cruel. This person is so fine but they have the nastiest attitude. They are so disrespectful to girls and call girls dirty names just because they are ugly or they hear things about them.
I don’t think a girl or a boy should be disrespected by any way just because they are ugly, because ugly people make them self look beautiful for by the way they are, the way they act. There’s a lot of people I know that are beautiful from the inside and outside those are the people you should respect, and either way respect the people who are beautiful in the inside and nasty on the outs because it don’t matter about anything beauty is in anyone.
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Fate Quote
Fate do your work. We human beings don’t control our own destinies. What is fated to happen must happen. So let it happen!
I believe that quote is true. Everyone says things happens for a reason and it does. We can control something’s like our choices, our actions, emotions and what we want out of life. Sometimes things don’t go our way but that’s just reality. We’re put on this earth as an own individual. We live life wondering what’s going to happen next? We ask questions, why is this happening? But no one really knows because it’s Fate. God only knows what is going to happen to us and the reasons behind it. We may not like what happens and we may feel overwhelmed, but we always got to look on the out come out of it and realize we’re supposed to go through this. It may make you a
better person or destroy your work but, that you can control and make it better than it seems at times. For example, before I had come to Summit. I would always give up when something bad happened, at the time I didn’t know why it was happening and I would have a bad attitude about it. Which didn’t get me anywhere. I dwelled on it and wouldn’t move on. I didn’t care about anything. But than I got put into foster care and put into Summit and it taught me everything happens and I have to put it behind me and hope for the best. Now anytime something bad happens I tell myself this may suck right now but in the end it will turn out pretty good, I just have to keep my head held high and don’t let anything or anyone bring me down. Once I started doing that I had a better out look on life and what it’s about. It makes me feel much better when I do it.
I believe that quote is true. Everyone says things happens for a reason and it does. We can control something’s like our choices, our actions, emotions and what we want out of life. Sometimes things don’t go our way but that’s just reality. We’re put on this earth as an own individual. We live life wondering what’s going to happen next? We ask questions, why is this happening? But no one really knows because it’s Fate. God only knows what is going to happen to us and the reasons behind it. We may not like what happens and we may feel overwhelmed, but we always got to look on the out come out of it and realize we’re supposed to go through this. It may make you a
better person or destroy your work but, that you can control and make it better than it seems at times. For example, before I had come to Summit. I would always give up when something bad happened, at the time I didn’t know why it was happening and I would have a bad attitude about it. Which didn’t get me anywhere. I dwelled on it and wouldn’t move on. I didn’t care about anything. But than I got put into foster care and put into Summit and it taught me everything happens and I have to put it behind me and hope for the best. Now anytime something bad happens I tell myself this may suck right now but in the end it will turn out pretty good, I just have to keep my head held high and don’t let anything or anyone bring me down. Once I started doing that I had a better out look on life and what it’s about. It makes me feel much better when I do it.
Friday, January 7, 2011
True Beauty Covered Up
“But oh, what a deceiver he turned out to be! Only really cruel people can be called deformed. Virtue is beauty, but someone beautiful and wicked is like an empty box decorated by the devil.”
I think that’s sort of how I am, I’m sort of nice to people like I act nice to everyone but when I get in trouble or someone says I’m rude like it’s hard for other people to believe that I’m rude because I always cover my pain up with laughter and crying I don’t ever be rude to any one, I just keep it to my self.
Like I can be one of the most nicest people you could ever meet but when you do something to me like that would really hurt me at first I’m just really sad and I let you do it all the time and I don’t ever say any thing to you or any one, but than after a while I just get tired of it and I’m the rudest person like I don’t care what any one tells me because I just was covering up my feelings for the longest time so it just comes out in anger after a while.
Sometimes the most prettiest girls are the meanest girls out there they think there better than every one else, and a lot of people always want to be like them cause their pretty but they have the nastiest attitude.
If there ugly they get made fun of a lot but if you really get to know them you’ll think their so nice and you could become best friends, or maybe just really good friends with them.
Your looks don’t always determine everything about you sometimes you just got to get to know the real them.
I think that’s sort of how I am, I’m sort of nice to people like I act nice to everyone but when I get in trouble or someone says I’m rude like it’s hard for other people to believe that I’m rude because I always cover my pain up with laughter and crying I don’t ever be rude to any one, I just keep it to my self.
Like I can be one of the most nicest people you could ever meet but when you do something to me like that would really hurt me at first I’m just really sad and I let you do it all the time and I don’t ever say any thing to you or any one, but than after a while I just get tired of it and I’m the rudest person like I don’t care what any one tells me because I just was covering up my feelings for the longest time so it just comes out in anger after a while.
Sometimes the most prettiest girls are the meanest girls out there they think there better than every one else, and a lot of people always want to be like them cause their pretty but they have the nastiest attitude.
If there ugly they get made fun of a lot but if you really get to know them you’ll think their so nice and you could become best friends, or maybe just really good friends with them.
Your looks don’t always determine everything about you sometimes you just got to get to know the real them.
Friday, December 10, 2010
My New Beginning
“She is one beautiful girl!” My heart beated shaking from a mixture of feelings!
I took a look at her as I held her in my arms, “She is!!” I said to the nurse. “How can you love someone so much that you just met?!” I was scared bringing a new baby into the world not knowing what to expect. Excitement filled me up as my mom took a look at her, “A new beginning” she said with a big smile on her face, “She is defiantly a Genesis.” As we drive home form the hospital she starts to cry. It was the cutest thing until the point where she wouldn’t shut up. We fed her some baby formula and she stopped. The first night was bad. She cried all through the night she just wouldn’t sleep. Since she was with me all day (because lucky for me it was summer vacation) I would not let her take naps through the day so maybe she would sleep at night, but it didn’t work. After awhile she got used to it and everything went better.
For her first birthday I took her to the store and I got her a new outfit that she loved! I showered her and got her ready, my mom threw her a birthday party. “She looks so cute and big!” My aunt said holding Genesis present in one of her hands, “She’s adorable” My older sister said, standing behind her. I knew Genesis was having a great time because like me she loves attention! Finally, it was time to cut the cake, she was ever so happy, and finally she blew the candle out! She was probably too young to know about the birthday wish so as I stood behind her and whisper “I hope you grow up to be a smart, strong and beautiful woman.” As for now I think its one wish that might actually come true!
When I take a look at her now (she’s three) it’s like I can see my reflection. She wants to be just like me.” When are you coming back?” she asks hoping I say today, holding back my tears I respond “Soon baby girl” I can see she wants to cry too. Her black, Chinese eyes can speak the words she doesn’t want to say, “Why not today? We can go pick you up, gather your stuff”, regretting every stupid decision I’ve made, wanting to cry, not wanting to hear what she’d say next “What’s wrong?” she asks confused as a three year old can be, not understanding the situation I have put myself in, I cant find an answer to her question. I hang up the phone, tell my fosters the call was lost. I can’t hold the tears any longer and I brake! Wanting to be with my little girl and whishing I was with her! I think of her again her face, her smile, her laugh, and it gives me hope! I find the reason I want to change, I find the reason why I need to straighten up... Because at home there is a little girl who waits for the day that I can be home to stay for good.
I took a look at her as I held her in my arms, “She is!!” I said to the nurse. “How can you love someone so much that you just met?!” I was scared bringing a new baby into the world not knowing what to expect. Excitement filled me up as my mom took a look at her, “A new beginning” she said with a big smile on her face, “She is defiantly a Genesis.” As we drive home form the hospital she starts to cry. It was the cutest thing until the point where she wouldn’t shut up. We fed her some baby formula and she stopped. The first night was bad. She cried all through the night she just wouldn’t sleep. Since she was with me all day (because lucky for me it was summer vacation) I would not let her take naps through the day so maybe she would sleep at night, but it didn’t work. After awhile she got used to it and everything went better.
For her first birthday I took her to the store and I got her a new outfit that she loved! I showered her and got her ready, my mom threw her a birthday party. “She looks so cute and big!” My aunt said holding Genesis present in one of her hands, “She’s adorable” My older sister said, standing behind her. I knew Genesis was having a great time because like me she loves attention! Finally, it was time to cut the cake, she was ever so happy, and finally she blew the candle out! She was probably too young to know about the birthday wish so as I stood behind her and whisper “I hope you grow up to be a smart, strong and beautiful woman.” As for now I think its one wish that might actually come true!
When I take a look at her now (she’s three) it’s like I can see my reflection. She wants to be just like me.” When are you coming back?” she asks hoping I say today, holding back my tears I respond “Soon baby girl” I can see she wants to cry too. Her black, Chinese eyes can speak the words she doesn’t want to say, “Why not today? We can go pick you up, gather your stuff”, regretting every stupid decision I’ve made, wanting to cry, not wanting to hear what she’d say next “What’s wrong?” she asks confused as a three year old can be, not understanding the situation I have put myself in, I cant find an answer to her question. I hang up the phone, tell my fosters the call was lost. I can’t hold the tears any longer and I brake! Wanting to be with my little girl and whishing I was with her! I think of her again her face, her smile, her laugh, and it gives me hope! I find the reason I want to change, I find the reason why I need to straighten up... Because at home there is a little girl who waits for the day that I can be home to stay for good.
When I Walked Into the Court
“Claudia how have you been doing?” Asked my judge. I was 17years old when I walked into that court. It all started like this, the judge asked the group how I was doing and they said, she has got into a fight with a girl because of Miguel, and she has violated the Lightning Peaks rules, she has seen Miguel while she was in Lightning Peak. The Judge got mad more because I didn’t really go to school; i was just getting into a lot of trouble, not caring about my baby. I would always leave my baby with my mom when I was 15 years old I didn’t really think how it was being a mom. I was 15 years old when I first got into the system, that’s when I started being another Claudia. My baby boy was 10 months.
The reason I was in Lightning Peak was, because I got into fights, got alcohol tickets, curfew tickets the one that suggested me to be in that was the judge. When the judge heard everything she had to hear she said, “Claudia is put into DCFS, she has a choice to volunteer to take her baby with her.” I said, “I want him to come with me. I felt sad; angry towards this because I don’t want to put my son threw this. After court I said bye to my family I was crying because it hurt me being in the system because of a guy I love. My caseworker told us he was taking me to meet my foster parent’s. When I got to the DCFS I felt so sad because I was going away somewhere else away from my family but the good thing I had my baby. When the foster parent’s got their I said, “Hi”. They were white. When we got to their house they showed me my room, so I got in my room and started crying.
It’s been so hard for me being in foster care. I almost got my baby token away, but the good thing is I got a chance. The DCFS has given me lots of chances. The last chance they gave me I learned my lesson and started doing so well, and keeping my head up, because they aid any little thing I did I will get him token away. I know I should of change the day I had this baby, but I guess I was hard headed. I’ve been trough a lot in my life. I don’t have my parent’s, I’ on my own, I have 2 brother’s here, but I can’t move with them. I’ve learned not to give up and especially for someone I love, that is never their for his family.
In till this day I’ve never gave up, I have been doing well so I can support my son and I. I don’t need anybody I know I can do it by my self I don’t think I need his dad right now. I know I do but I have to do the best for my son, if he ever does change who knows we might be together, but till now I don’t want him in our life’s he has hurt us a lot, my baby doesn’t need that, but I’ll always have his back, and be down for him. In till this day I’ve learned to always listen to my parents, and never do anything for someone who is not worth it, always think about my baby first before I do something stupid because look what I’ve gotten my self and my baby into, but I’m almost threw this, I know I can do it on my own.
The reason I was in Lightning Peak was, because I got into fights, got alcohol tickets, curfew tickets the one that suggested me to be in that was the judge. When the judge heard everything she had to hear she said, “Claudia is put into DCFS, she has a choice to volunteer to take her baby with her.” I said, “I want him to come with me. I felt sad; angry towards this because I don’t want to put my son threw this. After court I said bye to my family I was crying because it hurt me being in the system because of a guy I love. My caseworker told us he was taking me to meet my foster parent’s. When I got to the DCFS I felt so sad because I was going away somewhere else away from my family but the good thing I had my baby. When the foster parent’s got their I said, “Hi”. They were white. When we got to their house they showed me my room, so I got in my room and started crying.
It’s been so hard for me being in foster care. I almost got my baby token away, but the good thing is I got a chance. The DCFS has given me lots of chances. The last chance they gave me I learned my lesson and started doing so well, and keeping my head up, because they aid any little thing I did I will get him token away. I know I should of change the day I had this baby, but I guess I was hard headed. I’ve been trough a lot in my life. I don’t have my parent’s, I’ on my own, I have 2 brother’s here, but I can’t move with them. I’ve learned not to give up and especially for someone I love, that is never their for his family.
In till this day I’ve never gave up, I have been doing well so I can support my son and I. I don’t need anybody I know I can do it by my self I don’t think I need his dad right now. I know I do but I have to do the best for my son, if he ever does change who knows we might be together, but till now I don’t want him in our life’s he has hurt us a lot, my baby doesn’t need that, but I’ll always have his back, and be down for him. In till this day I’ve learned to always listen to my parents, and never do anything for someone who is not worth it, always think about my baby first before I do something stupid because look what I’ve gotten my self and my baby into, but I’m almost threw this, I know I can do it on my own.
The Forever Proposal
“Hello? Mom, Guess what? I get to come home for a visit.” I said into the receiver to my mother. I was so excited to be able to come home and see my family.
“That’s great sweet-heart, what time do I need to pick you up?” my mother said to me as I asked my staff what was the best time. I then relayed the time to my mother.
Calmly and very suspiciously I asked my mother in a soft whisper “Mom make sure Ash comes with okay mom?”
“Don’t worry Hun I’ll make sure she comes,” my mother assured me. Then the line went dead, and I went to my room to get ready for the day of my biggest decision ever. I was so excited but at the same time, I was scared that what would happen if it wouldn’t go as I planned.
“Are you excited to go see your family Cody?” my staff asked me as I got ready to go to church. “Hell yeah I am why wouldn’t I be?” I asked questioningly. After church I went back to my room and was waiting very anxiously for my mother to arrive.
“Hey sweetie, are you ready to go?” asked my mother, as she checked me out of the place I was staying at, which in all consideration was a rhetorical question that I didn’t answer as we climbed into the truck to go to my home. The ride home was very short but quiet like my mom and dad were plotting some grand scheme.
“Hey babe” I said as I swept me girlfriend into my arms and embracing her with a big long warm hug and then released her and kissed her perfectly soft and beautiful lips.
“I’ve missed you so much babe,” my girlfriend said to me as my best friend walked up to me and embraced me in a friendly hug.
When we got inside we went to the living room and sat on the couch as my girlfriend cuddled right up next to me with the rest of my family around us, who were waiting to hear about what I had been up to for the past couple of months.
After a while we migrated to the kitchen for my girlfriends surprise birthday party, which she found out a couple of days before hand. We had some cake and mingled amongst ourselves tell each other what we have been up to for the past little while. When everyone started heading back to the living room I hollered at everyone.
“Wait Ash hasn’t open her presents yet” I said eagerly, stopping everyone in there tracks and they turned around and looked at me questioningly.
“Wait present? What present? I didn’t see anyone bring any presents in.” she asked as she looked around at everyone shaking there heads, until she met my eyes and realized I was on one knee with a little blue box.
“We have been through a lot the past few years there’s been pain, smiles, laughter, tears, but most of all there has always been love, Ashlie, I love you with all my heart and I want you to know that I want you, and only you, I want all of you forever and always. So now Ashlie Amanda Hansen, will you marry me?” as I opened the box and waited for her to answer. She suddenly broke into tears and smiled and said through all the emotion as hard as she could.
“Yes, yes forever I love you Cody, I would be happy to marry you.” As I slipped the ring onto her finger as she jumped on me and embraced me in another hug and locking her lips onto mine with a kiss. I felt overwhelmed and felt like my heart would burst out from my chest from the love I felt.
“That’s great sweet-heart, what time do I need to pick you up?” my mother said to me as I asked my staff what was the best time. I then relayed the time to my mother.
Calmly and very suspiciously I asked my mother in a soft whisper “Mom make sure Ash comes with okay mom?”
“Don’t worry Hun I’ll make sure she comes,” my mother assured me. Then the line went dead, and I went to my room to get ready for the day of my biggest decision ever. I was so excited but at the same time, I was scared that what would happen if it wouldn’t go as I planned.
“Are you excited to go see your family Cody?” my staff asked me as I got ready to go to church. “Hell yeah I am why wouldn’t I be?” I asked questioningly. After church I went back to my room and was waiting very anxiously for my mother to arrive.
“Hey sweetie, are you ready to go?” asked my mother, as she checked me out of the place I was staying at, which in all consideration was a rhetorical question that I didn’t answer as we climbed into the truck to go to my home. The ride home was very short but quiet like my mom and dad were plotting some grand scheme.
“Hey babe” I said as I swept me girlfriend into my arms and embracing her with a big long warm hug and then released her and kissed her perfectly soft and beautiful lips.
“I’ve missed you so much babe,” my girlfriend said to me as my best friend walked up to me and embraced me in a friendly hug.
When we got inside we went to the living room and sat on the couch as my girlfriend cuddled right up next to me with the rest of my family around us, who were waiting to hear about what I had been up to for the past couple of months.
After a while we migrated to the kitchen for my girlfriends surprise birthday party, which she found out a couple of days before hand. We had some cake and mingled amongst ourselves tell each other what we have been up to for the past little while. When everyone started heading back to the living room I hollered at everyone.
“Wait Ash hasn’t open her presents yet” I said eagerly, stopping everyone in there tracks and they turned around and looked at me questioningly.
“Wait present? What present? I didn’t see anyone bring any presents in.” she asked as she looked around at everyone shaking there heads, until she met my eyes and realized I was on one knee with a little blue box.
“We have been through a lot the past few years there’s been pain, smiles, laughter, tears, but most of all there has always been love, Ashlie, I love you with all my heart and I want you to know that I want you, and only you, I want all of you forever and always. So now Ashlie Amanda Hansen, will you marry me?” as I opened the box and waited for her to answer. She suddenly broke into tears and smiled and said through all the emotion as hard as she could.
“Yes, yes forever I love you Cody, I would be happy to marry you.” As I slipped the ring onto her finger as she jumped on me and embraced me in another hug and locking her lips onto mine with a kiss. I felt overwhelmed and felt like my heart would burst out from my chest from the love I felt.
Best Day Ever
“Oh my god, Your so beautiful” said my dad. “Thanks daddy.” I said. It has been 4 years since I have seen my dad, it was the best day of my life to see him again. I felt like crying, just from hugging him.
“Look you have grown so much mija, I’m so glad I can hold you in my arms once again.” He told me. “ you to dad, you look like your doin good, I couldn’t wait to see you.” I said. “are you ready to meet your little sister, she looks so much like you, I get you too mixed up all the time” He said.
I was kind of nervous to meet Brooklyn, because I was the last kid my dad had and I didn’t want my place to be taken from me.“ yeah I’m ready” Later that day we got to his house and Brooklyn was inside sleeping, my step mom wanted to wake her up, but I told her I can wait till she wakes up herself, just so she’s not so ornery”.
Brooklyn finally woke up, she looked straight at me. My dad wasn’t lying, me and Brooklyn looked exactly alike. She walked over to me like she had known me forever, she gave me a big hug and didn’t let go. It felt so good to meet her.
“Its like looking in the mirror, but when I was little” I told my dad. “ your telling me, when I saw her I was so shocked, I told Tiffany do you know who she looks like? She looks like her older sister” he said. “I guess your gens are strong” Tiffany said. We all laughed. I told me dad why I was hesitating to meet Brooklyn, He just laughed, and told me “baby girl you don’t have to worry about Brooklyn taking your place, you have a special place in my heart, he said you’re my baby girl no matter how old you get.”
What I learned from this experience was that no matter what or who comes into my dads life I’ll always be his little girl.
“Look you have grown so much mija, I’m so glad I can hold you in my arms once again.” He told me. “ you to dad, you look like your doin good, I couldn’t wait to see you.” I said. “are you ready to meet your little sister, she looks so much like you, I get you too mixed up all the time” He said.
I was kind of nervous to meet Brooklyn, because I was the last kid my dad had and I didn’t want my place to be taken from me.“ yeah I’m ready” Later that day we got to his house and Brooklyn was inside sleeping, my step mom wanted to wake her up, but I told her I can wait till she wakes up herself, just so she’s not so ornery”.
Brooklyn finally woke up, she looked straight at me. My dad wasn’t lying, me and Brooklyn looked exactly alike. She walked over to me like she had known me forever, she gave me a big hug and didn’t let go. It felt so good to meet her.
“Its like looking in the mirror, but when I was little” I told my dad. “ your telling me, when I saw her I was so shocked, I told Tiffany do you know who she looks like? She looks like her older sister” he said. “I guess your gens are strong” Tiffany said. We all laughed. I told me dad why I was hesitating to meet Brooklyn, He just laughed, and told me “baby girl you don’t have to worry about Brooklyn taking your place, you have a special place in my heart, he said you’re my baby girl no matter how old you get.”
What I learned from this experience was that no matter what or who comes into my dads life I’ll always be his little girl.
My Cold Blue Night
It was getting late and the kids were getting fussy, I got the bambinos fed, washed and into bed.
He worked late evenings from 8:00p.m. To 3:00a.m. It felt like I never had time with him anymore. When he got off work all he did was eat sleep and go back to work.
I read a book then fall asleep. At three twenty seven a.m. he woke me up with the softest kiss and told me he had something he wanted to show me.
For a moment I was angry, but at the same time I knew he wouldn’t wake me for nothing.
I felt the cold still lingering from around his body from coming in from the cold.
He took me by the hand, up the stares, and rushed me towards the living room window, quickly and quietly so we wouldn’t wake the baby’s.
“He told me to close my eyes” I was hesitant at first, and then I thought to myself “he so bought me a new car”. He opened the window then said to me “open your eyes”.
It was the most adorable thing, and it made up for all the times he didn’t have time for me. There were about seven deer in the street and in our yard they were all equally beautiful.
They were running around in our front yard and looked as if they were playing tag under the moon light.
The sky was a dark, smoky blue. The moon was full and the light was reflecting from the moon to the freshly fallen snow, it was beautiful.
The deer and the weather made it perfect.
The snow, the moon and the stars all together made it even more romantic, almost like a fairy tail. We stared at the scene I could feel him watching me, I whispered “their beautiful.” He smiled and said “I think you’re beautiful.”
Back then I thought that we were perfect. Now my thought is blank. From then on, I left the sweet memories that I held in my heart to treasure, behind me and decided to make myself a promise for my own good; the word (LOVE), the emotion (LOVE), that tight annoying felling in you throat and the butterflies in your tummy (LOVE) will never be excepted in this cold dark heart of mine again.
He worked late evenings from 8:00p.m. To 3:00a.m. It felt like I never had time with him anymore. When he got off work all he did was eat sleep and go back to work.
I read a book then fall asleep. At three twenty seven a.m. he woke me up with the softest kiss and told me he had something he wanted to show me.
For a moment I was angry, but at the same time I knew he wouldn’t wake me for nothing.
I felt the cold still lingering from around his body from coming in from the cold.
He took me by the hand, up the stares, and rushed me towards the living room window, quickly and quietly so we wouldn’t wake the baby’s.
“He told me to close my eyes” I was hesitant at first, and then I thought to myself “he so bought me a new car”. He opened the window then said to me “open your eyes”.
It was the most adorable thing, and it made up for all the times he didn’t have time for me. There were about seven deer in the street and in our yard they were all equally beautiful.
They were running around in our front yard and looked as if they were playing tag under the moon light.
The sky was a dark, smoky blue. The moon was full and the light was reflecting from the moon to the freshly fallen snow, it was beautiful.
The deer and the weather made it perfect.
The snow, the moon and the stars all together made it even more romantic, almost like a fairy tail. We stared at the scene I could feel him watching me, I whispered “their beautiful.” He smiled and said “I think you’re beautiful.”
Back then I thought that we were perfect. Now my thought is blank. From then on, I left the sweet memories that I held in my heart to treasure, behind me and decided to make myself a promise for my own good; the word (LOVE), the emotion (LOVE), that tight annoying felling in you throat and the butterflies in your tummy (LOVE) will never be excepted in this cold dark heart of mine again.
Friday, November 12, 2010
“You’re saying its Controlling Behavior to Separate Her from Her Friend’s….
I think that guys should never be controlling over a girl, guys should let their girlfriend hang out with who ever they want. I think its bad when a guy is controlling, because they end up hitting you, in the book how Nick says that catline cant hang out with Elsa is not okay that is controlling. I remember when I was controlling with my boyfriend it was not good we always fought. When I was with my boyfriend I would tell him I don’t want you talking to girls but you know what I told him “you know what you can talk to who you ever you want you just need to set your limits.” I learned not to be controlling because being like that doesn’t take you no where.
I think Catline shouldn’t be with Nick because he is controlling , I think she’s going to end up getting hurt by him because mostly all guys that are controlling end up hitting their girl. This Quote remembers me also when my mom was with my little sister’s dad he was so controlling. He always hit my mom I was 10 years old when he hit her I still remember, No one should be controlling.
I think that guys should never be controlling over a girl, guys should let their girlfriend hang out with who ever they want. I think its bad when a guy is controlling, because they end up hitting you, in the book how Nick says that catline cant hang out with Elsa is not okay that is controlling. I remember when I was controlling with my boyfriend it was not good we always fought. When I was with my boyfriend I would tell him I don’t want you talking to girls but you know what I told him “you know what you can talk to who you ever you want you just need to set your limits.” I learned not to be controlling because being like that doesn’t take you no where.
I think Catline shouldn’t be with Nick because he is controlling , I think she’s going to end up getting hurt by him because mostly all guys that are controlling end up hitting their girl. This Quote remembers me also when my mom was with my little sister’s dad he was so controlling. He always hit my mom I was 10 years old when he hit her I still remember, No one should be controlling.
I slapped her not hit her.
Breathing underwater Pg. 23
When people say that I know they are lying and they will never tell the truth until they lose the one they love the most is gone. When its too late they want it back and its too late and too hard to get it back because when you do some thing like that it very hard too get their trust back, it takes a while to do it. That’s why people need too think before they do some thing they will regret or if they don’t they will lose the one they love, and when people say “Oh that’s the way I was raised” that’s a lie well maybe they were raised like that but if they didn’t like it then they shouldn’t treat other people like that. They have control of there own action.
When they do you need to let them go because once you get closer to them and have fun with them it get’s harder to say good bye. When you leave them they learn how to respect women and they will cherish they more then ever. For example when abusive men are coming to hang out with you and their friends call them to go smoke dope they ditch you or they tell you not to hang out with certain people.
Breathing underwater Pg. 23
When people say that I know they are lying and they will never tell the truth until they lose the one they love the most is gone. When its too late they want it back and its too late and too hard to get it back because when you do some thing like that it very hard too get their trust back, it takes a while to do it. That’s why people need too think before they do some thing they will regret or if they don’t they will lose the one they love, and when people say “Oh that’s the way I was raised” that’s a lie well maybe they were raised like that but if they didn’t like it then they shouldn’t treat other people like that. They have control of there own action.
When they do you need to let them go because once you get closer to them and have fun with them it get’s harder to say good bye. When you leave them they learn how to respect women and they will cherish they more then ever. For example when abusive men are coming to hang out with you and their friends call them to go smoke dope they ditch you or they tell you not to hang out with certain people.
Friday, October 29, 2010
Granted
Have you ever taken anything for granted? What makes you take it for granted? What makes you remember or appreciate what you took for granted?
Once I’ve taken granted of a special friendship that was important to my life. At the time I didn’t have a care in the world. But when I realized that this special friendship made me feel a feeling like never before and that I did care, I knew that I shouldn’t have taken it for granted. She was all I could think about and didn’t know what to do. It made me feel like I had just lost the world. Then I thought to myself “if I want this girl to be in my life then I need to do something about it”. I called and told her I needed to talk. I expressed every thought, every feeling, every expression and my heart to her. I did everything in my power to get her back. So I changed my attitude, ways and the way I expressed myself to her. I was able to get what I wanted most back in my life and don’t have the need to think twice about taking anything for granted. When you’ve taken something for granted you may not realize it and makes you feel bad. At the end of the day you realize what you’ve done wrong and messed up and that you lost what you wanted or what you were looking for in life. When you finally realize what you done you can always appreciate what you lost and maybe try to get it back if it’s possible, but some people choose to let it go so their left to wonder what could have happen. And now I know not to ever take her for granted again if I want to keep her in my life. I appreciate everything about her and remember every good memory spent together. That’s what I’ve taken for granted.
Once I’ve taken granted of a special friendship that was important to my life. At the time I didn’t have a care in the world. But when I realized that this special friendship made me feel a feeling like never before and that I did care, I knew that I shouldn’t have taken it for granted. She was all I could think about and didn’t know what to do. It made me feel like I had just lost the world. Then I thought to myself “if I want this girl to be in my life then I need to do something about it”. I called and told her I needed to talk. I expressed every thought, every feeling, every expression and my heart to her. I did everything in my power to get her back. So I changed my attitude, ways and the way I expressed myself to her. I was able to get what I wanted most back in my life and don’t have the need to think twice about taking anything for granted. When you’ve taken something for granted you may not realize it and makes you feel bad. At the end of the day you realize what you’ve done wrong and messed up and that you lost what you wanted or what you were looking for in life. When you finally realize what you done you can always appreciate what you lost and maybe try to get it back if it’s possible, but some people choose to let it go so their left to wonder what could have happen. And now I know not to ever take her for granted again if I want to keep her in my life. I appreciate everything about her and remember every good memory spent together. That’s what I’ve taken for granted.
Final Words
If I was dying in my bed and my parents were there by my side I would tell them that “I love them”, and I would tell them to “take care of my son and keep him safe”. Another thing I would tell them before I die is to make sure they discipline my son right and put him in a sport so he can focus on his mind about sports not other things like gangs, drugs, sex. My parents are so important to me I would tell them I was sorry for everything I’ve done to them, and to forgive me for being bad for them in the past, and not listen to them when they told me to stay out of trouble, because my parents use to tell me Claudia your going to get locked up if you keep hanging out with your friends, so I did I got locked up, I felt sad because my baby was out there with out me. I always look back of what I did and I regret I should of always listen to my parents but I didn’t that’s why I ended up in foster care. I would tell my mom and that that I will miss them...
I think the only thing that is worse then dying is loosing my son. I think dying is worse because my son will be with out me when he needs me. Another thing that is really worse than dying is if anything really bad ever happened to my son. I think dying is worse than all these things because my son will be with out me and what if he tries to do suicide because theirs some children that do that I want my son to be safe. I’m my sons everything he follows me more than his dad, and I don’t know what they would do with out me.
I think the only thing that is worse then dying is loosing my son. I think dying is worse because my son will be with out me when he needs me. Another thing that is really worse than dying is if anything really bad ever happened to my son. I think dying is worse than all these things because my son will be with out me and what if he tries to do suicide because theirs some children that do that I want my son to be safe. I’m my sons everything he follows me more than his dad, and I don’t know what they would do with out me.
In Dying Days
Do I believe that something can be worse than dying?
I think that depends on the person. For me something worse would
probably be stuff like losing a loved one, or being so ignored, disrespected and not
noticed that I just wouldn’t feel like even trying. That would suck. Or being
paralyzed permanently would suck hardcore. I don’t know how those people take all
that crap and get through it somehow. I would also hate to be one of those people who make fun of people who have serious problems. That would be like the worst
Feeling anyone could live with. Or those people that live through some serious
Traumas and are half alive with machines keeping them alive and they don’t even
Say or do anything. Also there are people with mental problems like schizophrenia,
And a bunch of other stuff. That would be enough for me to welcome death.
I feel bad for those people who go through that, but I feel even better when I hear about people who go through that and succeed. That’s pretty crazy how people can fight that
Without killing themselves. So it totally depends on the person. If you can take a lot of crap, or the opposite. Being so sick with a disease or sickness and living through that
might help you remember that suicide isn’t that that far away. I would hate to be put through that and live. So I believe that there is stuff worse than death out there. Or people
wouldn’t be committing suicide so much now days. Having everything taken from you wouldn’t be a good thing too, like your spouse, your house, family, anything. Also being addicted to something is worse than dying, I think. Committing your whole life to getting enough money for your next high on anything without you wanting to would set me over too. Some people know what I am talking about and it sucks. Well those are the reasons I believe that there are things out there that are worse than death.
I think that depends on the person. For me something worse would
probably be stuff like losing a loved one, or being so ignored, disrespected and not
noticed that I just wouldn’t feel like even trying. That would suck. Or being
paralyzed permanently would suck hardcore. I don’t know how those people take all
that crap and get through it somehow. I would also hate to be one of those people who make fun of people who have serious problems. That would be like the worst
Feeling anyone could live with. Or those people that live through some serious
Traumas and are half alive with machines keeping them alive and they don’t even
Say or do anything. Also there are people with mental problems like schizophrenia,
And a bunch of other stuff. That would be enough for me to welcome death.
I feel bad for those people who go through that, but I feel even better when I hear about people who go through that and succeed. That’s pretty crazy how people can fight that
Without killing themselves. So it totally depends on the person. If you can take a lot of crap, or the opposite. Being so sick with a disease or sickness and living through that
might help you remember that suicide isn’t that that far away. I would hate to be put through that and live. So I believe that there is stuff worse than death out there. Or people
wouldn’t be committing suicide so much now days. Having everything taken from you wouldn’t be a good thing too, like your spouse, your house, family, anything. Also being addicted to something is worse than dying, I think. Committing your whole life to getting enough money for your next high on anything without you wanting to would set me over too. Some people know what I am talking about and it sucks. Well those are the reasons I believe that there are things out there that are worse than death.
Final Words
My final words would have to be are paths will cross again. I know that sounds cheesy but I wouldn’t want my family to get all upset or do something stupid just because I died. At least when I told them that they would hopefully feel better. Then I would be able to move on.
If I was to say something to my mom I would
Hope I said something I would want her to hear before I died. Hopefully I won’t die before her
If I was to say something to my little brother it would be don’t turn out like me please. Because I have done some pretty bad stuff
To my dad I would say thanks for your time with me
Thanks for putting up with me all these years. Hopefully I won’t die before him as well.
To my older brothers I would say six different final words to each one cause there is exactly six brothers older than me in the family!
To all of my friends I would say thank you for being my friend all threes years even when I would not be a good friend sometimes.
Hopefully I will say my finals words to people every time I see them because no ones knows exactly when their going to die. Except animals but I am not talking about them.
If I was to say something to my mom I would
Hope I said something I would want her to hear before I died. Hopefully I won’t die before her
If I was to say something to my little brother it would be don’t turn out like me please. Because I have done some pretty bad stuff
To my dad I would say thanks for your time with me
Thanks for putting up with me all these years. Hopefully I won’t die before him as well.
To my older brothers I would say six different final words to each one cause there is exactly six brothers older than me in the family!
To all of my friends I would say thank you for being my friend all threes years even when I would not be a good friend sometimes.
Hopefully I will say my finals words to people every time I see them because no ones knows exactly when their going to die. Except animals but I am not talking about them.
People take a lot of things for granted, life is one thing that we should not. We act as if we have the rest of our lives but life can be taken as just as it is be given. We can be gone today within a blink of an eye. Tomorrow is not promised to any one of us so we have to live for today, and that is a must. I don’t know maybe we get greedy and think that our problems are the biggest and that we are the ones that need to get help first that we are the most important people well that is not what I think.
I think we need to take time out of our day look to the person to the side of us and get off our asses and try to help them and do what we can to help them and at the end of the day look back and thick what we did and that we as a individual have helped a nother person and in the end sleep in peace knowing that you get what you give and that it will come back to you in the end whether it is at judgment time or the very next day.
I think we need to take time out of our day look to the person to the side of us and get off our asses and try to help them and do what we can to help them and at the end of the day look back and thick what we did and that we as a individual have helped a nother person and in the end sleep in peace knowing that you get what you give and that it will come back to you in the end whether it is at judgment time or the very next day.
I love you
Would I want to my family I love you before they passed away. Yes I would because I had an aunt that passed away and she was my favorite aunt in the whole wide world. When she passed away I didn’t even get to say good bye or anything because she passed away before I could see her again and it broke my heart into a million peaces. She was always traveling and to this day it still kills me, but I know she’s in a better place now and not in pain any more. One thing I wish though is that she could of seen my son before she went, she didn’t even get to see him once she was supposed to come see a day after she died and I feel so bad for that but she can see him now and that’s all that matters.
But what she would have said I am always there. When ever I think of her I can see her in my memories of her. The thing I miss most about her is her laugh and her personality, you know in my house I had to take down all of her pictures because it hurt so bad but there all going back up slowly. She didn’t die that long ago only two months ago. I wanted too jump in the casket with her I didn’t want her to go I wanted her to stay.
When I found out my aunt died I fell on my knees and stated crying I couldn’t believe it I just wish she was still her I miss her so much. When she laughed every one laughed, when she smiled every one smiled.
I love you aunty and R.I.P I’ll see you soon you are always in my heart and in every one else’s.
But what she would have said I am always there. When ever I think of her I can see her in my memories of her. The thing I miss most about her is her laugh and her personality, you know in my house I had to take down all of her pictures because it hurt so bad but there all going back up slowly. She didn’t die that long ago only two months ago. I wanted too jump in the casket with her I didn’t want her to go I wanted her to stay.
When I found out my aunt died I fell on my knees and stated crying I couldn’t believe it I just wish she was still her I miss her so much. When she laughed every one laughed, when she smiled every one smiled.
I love you aunty and R.I.P I’ll see you soon you are always in my heart and in every one else’s.
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Marriage
I think that they had arranged marriages back then so that the parents can have their child in a family they feel okay about. Also so that they know their child is in a safe family. The benefits from this would be that the family’s that have known each other for awhile could all be one big family instead of just friends.
The disadvantage would be that the couple getting married has a big chance of not liking each other. Or they just want to be friends. The big problem would be what if he/she is in love with someone else. This leaves a question. Did the parents really care about their children’s own feelings? My opinion about this idea is that it never should have been thought of. Because a lot a kids had parents that didn’t like each other and probably fought a lot. I’m just glad that doesn’t happen here in Utah. If any religion or country says that you have to do that then that just Wrong not just in one way but in many ways. Because these days people can get a divorce. Which then leaves kids in a bad spot.
The disadvantage would be that the couple getting married has a big chance of not liking each other. Or they just want to be friends. The big problem would be what if he/she is in love with someone else. This leaves a question. Did the parents really care about their children’s own feelings? My opinion about this idea is that it never should have been thought of. Because a lot a kids had parents that didn’t like each other and probably fought a lot. I’m just glad that doesn’t happen here in Utah. If any religion or country says that you have to do that then that just Wrong not just in one way but in many ways. Because these days people can get a divorce. Which then leaves kids in a bad spot.
Living in 1793
If I was living in the year 1793, I would not be happy. That would suck really bad. But it would be kind of cool to live back then. I don’t know exactly what I would do. Probably live the normal life of a 1793 person. I think I would go crazy without technology though. That would be one of the many hard parts of living back then. I would prefer the mid-evil times. That would be awesome. But I don’t know what I would do for jobs though. Maybe build houses, because that’s what I do is build houses with my dad. That would be a good job for me. I would like to have a wife and kids. Just live life like normal and have fun. But there wouldn’t be much to do like now days. No heavy metal. No video games, no legend of Zelda. Not as many sports as now days. No television, no head banging, no mosh pits. No nothing! Those are some of the reasons I would hate it back then. I would not like not having those things.
But a couple of reasons on why I would like it would be that there would not be as much evil a there is now days. The air would be more pure, people might be nicer, stuff like that. But those might not be true. But that is how I view it would be. I wouldn’t mind the music from back then. But still, it would suck. But this paragraph is about the stuff I would like. I might also like the food. You would be more healthy back then. I wouldn’t mind being a farmer either. That would be cool with me. As long as I got paid a good amount for how hard I worked. Those are most of the reasons I would like/hate living in 1973. I still would prefer the mid-evil ages over the 1700’s. but that’s my point of view.
But a couple of reasons on why I would like it would be that there would not be as much evil a there is now days. The air would be more pure, people might be nicer, stuff like that. But those might not be true. But that is how I view it would be. I wouldn’t mind the music from back then. But still, it would suck. But this paragraph is about the stuff I would like. I might also like the food. You would be more healthy back then. I wouldn’t mind being a farmer either. That would be cool with me. As long as I got paid a good amount for how hard I worked. Those are most of the reasons I would like/hate living in 1973. I still would prefer the mid-evil ages over the 1700’s. but that’s my point of view.
Funeral
I think attending a funeral is really important. Well it really depends on who it was, how about if it was someone that you don’t like right? I’ve attended a hole bunch already, I hate going to them. Because I hate seen mothers cry so when I do it hurts me like no other. Especially when it is the mother’s of some of my closes home boys. I love all my homies, but when I see them dead in front in their funeral I fill like they are just going to wake up. And say what it do dawg. So if that will happen I will proplably put him to sleep myself lol. And its important specially if you really considered him or her your homies. If don’t go to the homies funeral chales that’s some really mest up stuff. I have attended all of my dead homies funerals even if I have to leave Utah for a couple of days.
But then again that’s me and theirs no one like me. So if your reading this don’t be a punk and be a two face to them when their alive. Go to their funeral to ok dawgy’s don’t be mest up.
But then again that’s me and theirs no one like me. So if your reading this don’t be a punk and be a two face to them when their alive. Go to their funeral to ok dawgy’s don’t be mest up.
Being a Snob
A person who is stuck up and thinks that they are better than others, makes fun of people because how they dress. I think in the book Fever Jeannie is a snobbish because she makes fun of Jeannie’s family coffee shop saying that there shop is grog shop, and a grog shop means that they let people drink and fight. The coffee shop doesn’t serve alcohol.
Jeannie is a mean girl who thinks’ she better than Matilda’s family, like in the book she doe’s means things to Matilda when mom doesn’t see ex: she sticks her toung out at her. I’ve been told before that I was a snob because I use to think I was better then everyone else, and I have in the past, I always thought I was better then my cosines which we were all the same but I always thought I was good, and I was stuck up but not anymore I’m my self it is always good being your self not someone who you aren’t really.
I remember when some girls in my school use to always think they were better then me, I don’t know why girls always think that there better then another actually all girls are the same no one is perfect than anyone there’s no one in the world who is perfect. There are a lot of girls who are snobs and those are some girls who are rich, and girls who think there better then everyone.
Jeannie is a mean girl who thinks’ she better than Matilda’s family, like in the book she doe’s means things to Matilda when mom doesn’t see ex: she sticks her toung out at her. I’ve been told before that I was a snob because I use to think I was better then everyone else, and I have in the past, I always thought I was better then my cosines which we were all the same but I always thought I was good, and I was stuck up but not anymore I’m my self it is always good being your self not someone who you aren’t really.
I remember when some girls in my school use to always think they were better then me, I don’t know why girls always think that there better then another actually all girls are the same no one is perfect than anyone there’s no one in the world who is perfect. There are a lot of girls who are snobs and those are some girls who are rich, and girls who think there better then everyone.
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